i'm a bad man to keep

make me mad, i'm not here to please

the air of the club was heavy with a thick, musky sort of smell - definitely a man's smell by mortal standards, ioann was sure, though really it mostly just reminded him of mortals in general. regardless, this sort of dingy hang-out wasn't a place that ioann fairechild usually found himself gravitating towards; there were, of course, plenty of places in astraia built by mortals that he felt drawn towards, like a moth to a flame. gardens, for example. they were the only places in the whole town that didn't make his skin itch with iron content. as a general rule, he didn't really go toward bars.

but tonight wasn't just an average night, either.because while ioann liked to put off that he was above mortal desires, he was not. the idea of evergreen affection was so completely obliterated for him long ago that he, more often than not, would deign to stay away from the sort of places where one would "hook up". he didn't need love, or affection, or the touch of another man because he was smarter than that. yes, he'd been stupid once before. but the mere idea of needing someone else to love him just didn't seem as important to him - almost as if he'd forgotten how to register affection for someone.

every once in a while, however, there came a desperate craving to feel it. not fall into it, but get just a brief taste of what it was like to experience mortal indulgence for just a little while. for the shortest of times, ioann could develop a mask to hide over himself - the kind of mask that batted its lashes and smiled in the most demure way to lure handsome creatures out of the darker corners of the bar. he would chalk this desire up to wanting to feel such mortality at his fingertips; but something in the back of his head would remind it that perhaps, for once in his life, he was feeling lonely.

not lonely, he thought defiantly as he sat down at the end of the bar and ordered himself a drink. not lonely. just... indulgent. that's it.

it was a few weeks before school started, and he would have much rather have gone to school without that itch of desire burning at his fingertips. it would be easiest, he reasoned as he took a sip of the bitter, fiery liquid, if he found someone, spent the night, and then left early in the morning... someone he'd never see again, of course.